Things I Learned at the Cleveland Air Show

I went to the Air Show with my dad on Sunday and we had a really good time. For different reasons, 2008 hasn't been an easy year for my dad or I but from everything my mom and sister said, my dad really enjoyed it and was glad that I took him. That made it worth it for me. While there, I also learned the following:

1. I will never grow tired of watching and listening to planes with 40,000+ pounds of thrust. There is nothing that sounds like a fighter jet and there is no cooler sight than that of a shockwave cone forming around the fuselage of an airplane as it flies by you at 600mph.

2. The amount of fat that can be supported by the human skeletal system is truly astonishing. There were some enormously obese people down at the lakefront. I think Ive become immune to the sheer percentage of overweight people in our population but there were some seriously fat people at this show. Almost as a testament to this, there was a stand renting and selling those canvas folding lawn chairs and, frighteningly, there was one that they advertised as being able to hold 1,000lbs. There were a few people at the show who could've given this chair all it could handle. And they never seemed to stop eating.

3. At the same time, there were some unbelievably pretty women at the show. Alas, all of them were with guys. I realized in looking at them that I currently have no ability to talk to women I find really attractive. Being married for several years has eradicated all my flirting skills but at least I now also look significantly older. For just a few minutes, I was saddened by the realization that the women I was most attracted to were the ones I probably had the least chance of success with.

4. The level of ignorance of the average American is staggering. I bought box seats for my dad and I and during the flights of some of the World War II aircraft, I had to listen to the guy next to me explain to his female friend, who was at least in her mid 30's, that we fought both the Japanese and Germans during World War II. This woman had no idea what Pearl Harbor was and had clearly never heard of the D-Day invasion. I hope she's not a registered voter but she probably is and I guarantee you that this dolt has a resolute opinion about who should be our next president. (Lest you think this is an isolated incident, I went out to lunch today. Just when I was feeling a little self-conscious about being the only patron sitting by himself at Ruby Tuesday, I felt a little better about my lot in life when I had to tell the server how many weeks are in a year. She and another server were trying to figure out how much someone would make in a year at a given hourly wage and they were struggling mightily).

Some people might read this and feel it's a pretty condescending post but I would disagree. There is no excuse for being grossly obese. The percentage of people who have a bona fide medical condition causing extreme weight gain is incredibly small. Thus, most cases of obesity in this country are due solely to a lack of will power. People stuff their faces, nonstop, full of crap and they engage in almost no exercise. They should be ashamed of themselves. I'm not suggesting everyone can have a body like a model. But there is no excuse other than sheer laziness for being more than 30lbs overweight.

There is also no excuse for not knowing major facts about World War II or how many weeks there are in a year. This is basic knowledge that people should have to function in daily life or be able to engage in intelligent conversation. Only true history buffs can cite the implication of every major World War II battle but every citizen ought to know why we fought the war, who we fought, and the major events of the time. How anyone graduates from a school system without such knowledge is beyond me.

In this election season, I think it's important to keep in mind that this is, by and large, the voting public. We're a bunch of fat, lazy, ignorant people. If the American people don't care enough about themselves to change this, why do we deserve a president who is any better? And how can people who don't know who attacked us in World War II or how many weeks are in a year even be trusted to pick the person most qualified to lead what, for a little while longer, is still the most powerful country in the world. When I think about how we ended up with McCain and Obama as our two choices, I didn't have to go any further than the Air Show for my answer.